Big city dreams for a small-city boy

{Good work}
06 May 2003 @ 1:39 AM

BGM: "I Can't Stop Raving" by DJ Liquid
Wanting: random office sex

For the past two days work has been really cool and has had some awesome and memorable events (for a change).

Sunday marked my grand return to a full-time schedule. That means one more hour of talking to a bunch of people that don't mean anything to me at all (on the phones, that is), but whatever, it's a living.

Anyway, Sunday also held two very mirthful moments, and they both had to do with two out of the three men there who make my heart melt; Matt and Hoyt.

Well, the first isn't too exciting, but I certainly felt all twitterpated over it. Matt, when walking past me (he was coming at my direction) said his normal "Hey, what's up?" but spiced it up by touching my shoulder. If it weren't for the setting and maybe some cheap 99¢ porn, I would've just taken him right there. But Ally McBealish-typed fantasies aside, I am logging that into my Proof if Proof Needed book on hints that people drop.

Okay, so maybe I overanalyze things too much, but when one has an imagination as active as mine, why waste it?

On to Hoyt. It was later into my shift (I work until 11:00 PM on Sundays), I was at a standing computer and Hoyt was a row over from me... Oh wait, this needs to be set up first.

Okay, so I'm taking this photography class at EON and I'm trying to take as many random pictures as I can of various things that I'm supposed to deem artsy-looking and whatnot. I took a few at work, one of my reflection in the mirror (with the camera in my hands), another at the rounded mirror in one of the upper corners of the hallway and of one of my co-workers cool-looking orange floral coffee traveler's mug.

Back to Hoyt, so I am craving some live people as subjects for my pictures and of course Hoyt is the hottest thing since the Sun in August, so I proposition him. He seems a little uneasy about it (granted, it's not everyday that such a proposition is made), but it wasn't like I was asking him to pose nude or anything. I just asked him to do what he was doing (typing on the computer) and I just asked him to give me a pensive look while doing so. Most fortunately for me, he agreed and now I have a picture of him that I will treasure forever!


As for today's good stuff, I actually met a co-worker through my talent (and cure for boredom); my drawings. She (her name is Melissa) said that she's noticed me and wanted to ask me if I could draw something for her. As it turns out, she's a rave DJ whose specialty is Drums and Bass and is making her demo album and she wants me to design her CD cover. Her look that she wants is a schoolgirl on the turntables (kinda a Cruel Intentions meets Groove). I am totally psyched, though she's a self-professed jaded raver, once her album hits the markets, the whole world will get a chance to see two awesome displays of talent (not to give myself too much credit)...

But yeah, that's work for you... If only it was this eventful more often. *Knocks on wood*



{Cinco de survey}
05 May 2003 @ 10:24 AM

BGM: "The Dance" by Rockell
Wanting: to party

Happy Binge Drinki- I mean, Happy Cinco de Mayo! Hoo-tee-hoot! Today I'll be celebrating by going to work and stealing surveys from people. This one comes courtesy of Jono, who in turn stole it from someone else, who took it from someone else, and so on and so forth, forever and ever gay men:

Use song titles to answer these questions----

1. Are you male or female?
Sk8er Boi (Avril Lavigne)

2. Describe yourself:
All You Wanted (Michelle Branch)

3. How do some people feel about you?
Why Does It Always Rain On Me? (Travis)

4. How do you feel about yourself?
Save Me (Remy Zero)

5. Describe your boyfriend/interest:
Damn, I Wish I Was Your Lover (Sophie B. Hawkins)

6. Where would you rather be?
In My Place (Coldplay)

7. Describe what you want to be:
Kids In America (Kim Wilde)

8. Describe how you live:
In This Diary (The Ataris)

9. Describe how you love:
Come What May (Nicole Kidman and Ewan McGregor)

10. Share a few words of wisdom:
"Where's it gonna get you acting serious?/Things are never gonna be quite what you want/Or even at 25, you gotta start sometime" - A Praise Chorus (Jimmy Eat World)



04 May 2003 @ 1:47 AM

BGM: "Baby, baby" by Corona
Wanting: Pyro

Baa. I am a sheep. I - along with everyone in the Tucson area - went to go see X2 yesterday. It was a really great movie. There is lots to tell about, and I'd like to, but I'm not going to spoil the storyline for anyone who might be reading this.

The day started out ordinarily enough. Matt had gotten a job shoveling a couple of tons of gravel for EON facilitator Joe and would not be joining us all day. It was kind of a downer, but what can one do?

Shaunda, Steve and I had made plans to gather a small group to go see the movie together at a matinee time. Unfortunately it almost fell through as only us three showed up. Once we were all accounted for, we made our way to get tickets for the show, only to find an insanely large line of people. All the matinee showings of the movie were sold out with the exception of the 2:00 one and we weren't going to risk it remaining that way once we got to the counter.

So off we went, we left the Park Place Mall in Shaunda's Saturn across Broadway to the El Con Mall where there was another Century theatre and more matinee showings. I jokingly said that we're all run-off from Park Place joining the rest of the people there who didn't have the foresight to buy their tickets online.

Once we got in, we found that all of the stadium seats were taken. That totally sucked. We would have to make due with sitting in the cheap seats. Only moments later would we find out that even those would fill up. Thankfully we were able to throw down and get seated next to each other.

Oh my God, I so nearly [insert embarrassing action here] when the previews showed! First, there was the ubiquitous Matrix: Reloaded preview that I only saw for the first time. That was so incredibly awesome. I swear, the Wachowski Brothers sure must watch tons of anime to inspire their storylines. I cannot wait. And Keanu Reeves' jacket that he wears that makes him look like a priest? Drool! Then came some movie starring Harrison Ford and Josh Hartnett. I don't remember what the title of it was, but seeing Josh reciting the famous yell from "A Streetcar Named Desire" while possibly naked (definitely from the waist up)? I'd sure like to see that. Okay, even the previews for Finding Nemo that new Disney pic looks cool. It's cute, it's got fishes and it doesn't have creepy-looking humans in it (at least not as far as what I saw in the previews).

But finally, back to the feature presentation. As a man of the homosexual persuasion, I must say that there was much to feast one's eyes on. Wolverine. Iceman. Pyro (oh, especially him). Cyclops. By the way, I think that him and Wolvie have some kinda pent-up sexual tension between them n'est pas? And don't tell me that it wasn't genius to cast Alan Cumming as Nightcrawler. That was a good move. The ending was totally touching, I teared up! Wonderful movie all together. If I were a movie critic, I'd give it two thumbs up, five out of five stars the gold medal and a bag of chips.

The rest of the day was so-so in comparison to the movie. Shaunda, Steve and I hung out again with Ruben and did some random park stuff, nothing special. Actually, Ruben, I and a few others were supposed to drive up to Phoenix tonight to go to Boom, but he didn't end up going. Matt and I had also made tentative plans to go to a rave, but that fell through too... oh well, you can't always get what you want.

Unless it's him:



{Save me! Save me! Save me!}
03 May 2003 @ 2:41 AM

BGM: "Bring Me to Life" by Evanescence
Wanting: a guy for me to save

So I know why I love the Evanescence's "Bring Me to Life" so much. It may sound incredibly weird, but I'm very, very tired right now and I want to put this down before I forget to mention it and it becomes lost forever in my cavernous post-teenage wastland of thoughts.

I like this song because for some reason I find guys that sing the phrase "save me" really sexy. I don't know why that is, I really don't. I just recently found out and have been reluctant to say anything for fear that I might come off as sounding like a freak. But at this hour, I really don't care.

Oh, and I finally got the text here to become a lot more readable, however it came at the cost of the page loading a lot slower. Until I decide to roll up my sleeves and dive into some heavy html, I think it shall remain as it is. Besides, I can't code to save me.

Ha! I just realized what I just said; rather, typed. Hoo... time for bed.



{Dee's 24th}
03 May 2003 @ 2:27 AM

BGM: "Perfect Day" by Hoku
Wanting: more booze

Hee... Being a gold member rocks hardcore! I actually had 100 visits yesterday! Granted, a chunk of it was myself trying to change the look of my diary, but still 100 is a lot, it's almost like a billion! I also got my first member to one of my diaryrings, yeah!

Anyway... I've been feeling really good about myself lately and all peppy and upbeat. I've had several confidence-boosters and I just feel like I can do anything. It's such a great feeling.

Thursday night was Dee's 24th birthday party. In typical fashion, our group ("Will-power and Grace") gathered to make it a memorable night. The premise was to just make it seem like we were going to go up to Mt. Lemmon to have an after-hours cook out. Ruben, Marc, Dee and I rode together, Matt and Shaunda went on their own. I don't know what it is, but riding in Ruben's jeep (or anyone's car, just so long as I'm not driving) makes me feel so alive! Like these really are the best times in my life and my mundane life of work and bills is a cast-off, distant memory.

Anyhow, on our way up to Mt. Lemmon, we stop at a Safeway and buy our food. Hot dogs for the meat-eaters, veggie dogs for Shaunda and I, and poor Matt with nothing (the veggie dogs aren't vegan). We also got drinks, Oreos, marshmallows and a big chocolate cake.

Once on the highway up to the mountain, Ruben starts putting on his sweatshirt while still driving. I know that he prides himself on being able to multitask, but one (especially one that drives like Ruben) should be able to dedicate oneself completely to driving. After convincing Ruben that we'd have a lessened risk of dying if he'd just pull off to the side of the road and put his sweater on, we did. Only, Shaunda didn't realize our sudden need to stop and did very suddenly, causing the cake in the backseat to fall over. Induced blonde moment? Yes, very much so.

Once we got re-oriented, we continued back up there. Now, it's getting really f-ing hot in Tucson, but at least the nights were still pleasant. Mt. Lemmon however, is still bitterly cold (especially at 10:00 at night) and stupid me didn't bring a jacket.

Finally arriving at our "destination" we got out and let some people relieve themselves (there were actually bathrooms, or as Marc would call them "thunder buckets").

Shaunda gave me the rope as we walked to a darkened campsite. Ruben played the blonde-in-distress act and got Dee to hold him. That's when he sprung the plan into action. He pushed her up against a tree and called for the rope. We tied her to the tree and took her sweater and shirt. He then gagged her and put her shirt over her head so that she wouldn't be able to see. With that, we made it seem like we were leaving her and walked away, except for Matt and I, who had to stay to ensure that Dee would be alright.

Once they left, Matt and I did our best to try and keep still as to not arouse any noise. Well, we kept that pretense up for a while before Matt decided to approach right next to Dee and moo at her. It was then that the original plan fell apart. From there we decided to reverse the trick on Ruben, Marc and Shaunda. We got Matt to give his shirt to Dee and Dee to give her bra to Matt. We then tied Matt to the tree and put Dee's shirt over his head. Those two however, wasted too much time and we didn't get to to it as well as we would've liked, so once we got Matt tied to the tree (in a rather lazy knot), Ruben and them were already coming back. It was then that I told Dee that we should go and take cover behind some brush.

Right up until the three approached the tree, they had no idea what we had done. Putting two and two together; "Dee" obviously being a lot hairier and the fact that "Matt" and I weren't around; they found that we had turned the tables on them. Though Dee an I were still in hiding. We were unsure of how to spring up and scare them, so it was when Ruben started saying "Don't think that you're going to scare me by jumping out and screaming." That we did just that and scared the living Prada out of him.

After we all settled down, and Ruben stopped being mad at us for spoiling his perfect plan, we started cooking up the food. Seeing as it was pitch-black, we had to wait to get the fire going and were using a flashlight with low batteries, a bicycle light and a noisy Star Wars Lightsabre.

When we finished eating and sang Happy Birthday to Dee (on what remained of her cake), we; rather Ruben; decided to tell some scary stories. It wasn't such a good idea, because one, we were so far from civilization that the events in such stories COULD very well happen and two, we had already had some instances where we heard strange noises. Ruben told some creepy, yet true stories anyway and ended up freaking Marc and I out. Not only that, but he also got himself freaked. Now, when such pillars of courage as Marc and Ruben start to lose it, I know that it's not a good sign. It was then that we decided that lest we all become victims to some creepy mountain man, ghost or aliens, we should just high-tail it out of there.

And we did.

And that was the funest night I could say that we had up on Mt. Lemmon ever... well aside from the time we went up there and I lost my wallet, but this has to be right up there...



{Gym guru deva}
01 May 2003 @ 4:40 PM

BGM: "Across the Universe" by Sean Lennon, Moby and Rufus Wainwright
Wanting: routine

[Note: For reasons that are not even known to me, I wrote the following while in an extremely laid-back mood, so as you read, you should imagine some kinda Yanni-esque, New Agey music playing in the background. Oh, and it helps if you read it slowly too.]

A cool and breezy night. I sit outside of Bentley's enjoying the night air, taking in the sweet ambience found in looking up, past McDonald's arches, further from the street lights from the super-busy intersection of Speedway and Campbell and peering at the blue-black sky. It is a quiet, if not an odd sense of calm that I like to find, drowning out the sounds of people driving by in their ghettofied Hondas, the sights of a bunch of sorority pledges walking down the street to Dirtbags wearing signs on them, and Ruben tutoring Dee in Spanish while using his most stereotypically falsettoed doña voice.


The food is brought out; a veggie burger for Matt, a couple of bagels for Ruben and three avocado sandwiches, one for Marc, Dee and one for me. Confusion abounds; everyone ordered the same thing? How can that be. Meanwhile, I reach in for some inner peace and solve it; I ordered my sandwich on wheat. From there, we are able to discern to whom each sandwich belongs. Dee's is on rye and Marc's is on white.


After we eat, we discuss various topics and eventually make our way to the-ever present topic amongst gay men; working out. Ruben, who is trying to get himself in shape for a job he got as a summer camp counselor in San Diego, told us how we should group together and work out until he has to leave at the end of May. The group springs to life with excitement over this announcement because theretofore, there had not been such a radical suggestion of solidarity in such a long time, not since a lot of us has started to outgrow EON (formerly QV). I give sign of my approval too, with an enthusiastic chime and a nod of excitement. As they further their discussion and start working at tentative plans, I brainstorm a bit to see what we should christen this newly-formed band of health-conscious misfits. Very quickly, two suggestions pop in, "Fit as Folk" (although, one can really tell that it took me all of three seconds to think of that one) and then "Will-power and Grace" (this one actually took a little more thought and is the one that I am personally proud of). I presented the group with my humble offerings. The latter of the two of course, garnering the most favorability. It not only states the obvious, but it has multiple meanings; Will-power meaning our endurance and level of committment that we should put forth into this, and Grace, not only to be taken as a sense of poise and elegance but as the family name of Ruben.

So that dear friends, is how "Will-power and Grace" came into being.



{Matt the accountant}
30 April 2003 @ 12:09 PM

BGM: "Barber's Adagio (ATB remix)" by William Ørbit
Wanting: money

Things seem to be going rather well as of late here at casa Matt's house. I wonder how long they'll hold... *knocks on wood* It's not like we should be experiencing turbulence at every turn, but things just seem more lively and good between us. Especially after last night (no sexual innuendo intended there)...

Matt and I seem to be communicating better these days. Which is kinda funny, my sign is not particularly known for being all talky-talky, but I've been the one craving the communication of the two of us. It would appear that Matt now sees my need for that and is going along with it. He lets me know about how to properly clean up after myself in the kitchen and how to not leave things in the living room. I know that it might come off as being naggy, but it sure beats him not saying anything and then getting mad at me way later after the point of relevance.

Also, last night he helped me figure out a budget. I'm going to go back to a full-time schedule at work and with my six-month raise coming up, I should be getting a nice chunk of change every pay period. Well, Matt worked it out that if I keep with it, I should have more than enough money for rent, food, and my current bills. So that means that come summertime, we just might get our dream place at the University area. *knocks on wood again* That would so rock hardcore.

I'm really glad that Matt's helping me, he is seriously the best thing that's ever happened to me. I really don't want to see a friendship like this end. *knocks on wood yet again* I just hope that he appreciates me even a fraction as much.



{Much needed day off}
29 April 2003 @ 5:26 PM

BGM: "Forever Young" by Temperance
Wanting: more days like this

I feel a little bad... I've gone ahead and done two things that I can say that I regret today. Firstly, I stayed up until about 2:00 in the morning goofing around with Matt in my room. Erm, it's not as sexual as it sounds, not by a lot. Matt's been wanting to revamp his blog for a long time and wanted to use my computer to check his progress because his computer's screen sucks.

Speaking of sucking, AOL's being a tard and is not properly loading Quizilla.

Anyway, because of how late we stayed up, I didn't get a proper night's sleep and when the time to awake came at 6:30, I wasn't fit to move, let alone dedicate seven precious hours chained to a desk. So I ended up calling in sick.

I'd like to think that I've gotten better at not being avoiditory of work, but for me to call in is still not a good thing. By not going in today, I've missed out on $63 dollars that I can't make up. Sure, I could sign up for some overtime, but why pretend like I'm actually going to do that? I've worked pretty damn hard to be able to enjoy Fridays and Saturdays off and I'm not about to go signing them away for the sake of whatever the crisis of the day may be. Oh, and besides, until mid-May, I still have class on those two days!

At least I'll be going back to full-time and will be able to make up the money then. And my six-month raise is coming up in June too. I'm also happy that Matt was supportive of my need for the day off.

Well, at least I was able to wrest these two quizzes before AOL decided to futz out on me.

Arial - You're pretty normal. That's certainly not
a bad thing, as a lot of people like you.

What Font Are You? (Standard Fonts)
brought to you by Quizilla

drown them
You for some reason would drown someone

How would you kill someone
brought to you by Quizilla



{Lord of the diaryrings}
29 April 2003 @ 1:07 PM

BGM: "Come What May (finale)" from Moulin Rouge
Wanting: free time

So, for the past couple of days I've been taking full advantage of my Gold Membership and have been creating a few diaryrings. The list of which is as follows:

Pretentious - A ring for people who like me, use "pretentious" as their favorite way of dismissing things/people that they don't like.
Silenced Love - For a love that you had/have that is completely one-sided. Meaning, those who love or have loved someone with all of their heart but haven't/never got a chance to tell them.
Pacific Northwest - Oh my God, I love this part of the country! I'm surprise that no one created such a ring before. I really love Seattle and Portland!
Neon Lights - Ooh... pretty shiny lights.
Andrew on BTVS - Mmm... Andrew.

So yes, for anyone that reads this, I invite you to join any of these rings (that is of course, if you're with diaryland).



{where do i start?}
i am... a dancer and a dreamer, latino, gay, a singer, a poet, an artist, a son, a brother, no one's lover, way too obsessed with sailor moon for my own good, a romantic, temporarily unemployed, and too much more to list here

{emotional me}
The current mood of invernal at

{fly me to the moon}

{reach out and touch me}

{i lurve these people}
rb colorkid
margaret cho
kitty magic

Sailor Luna: Chibi-usa, reenvisioned Sailor Moon: at least this gif has the ponytails hanging properly; BEHIND her Tuxedo Kamen: aka - T3H M45K3D MULL37
Sailor Jupiter: who? Sailor Mercury: once was lost, now a geek Sailor Mars: Venus' girltoy Sailor Venus: Mars' daddy

i was always blue-green cuz we are living in a material world...
« # Gay Diary ? »
Haruka to Michiru kirei
invited by the new age, i am sailorneptune, acting gracefully
typical genki schoolgirls by day, ass-kicking heroines in color-coded mini-skirts by night!
watch out for that mercury chick, she'll inhale you in one breath
we never change, do we?
can wang
Gone, but not forgotten: 
Buffy the Vampire Slayer 
It was a thing
Searing Idolitray - The Legion of Nerdy Doom Page
I adoped Andrew!